Estimated Mileage: 10 miles (plus 7 miles hiking)
Where the hell is Teplice nad Metuji?The pension that I was staying at was fairly barebones (they didn't even give you clean towels), but for around $15 per night, I wasn't complaining. Most importantly, it was right at the trailhead for the "Teplice Rocks" national park. This is a series of limestone rock formations which I walked around, slack-jawed, for the good part of the day.
It was an other-worldly place, with 200-year-old graffiti, the bust of Goethe and thousands of mutant monuments. There were two major hikes and I did both of them, staggering around, sounding like Keanu Reeves most of the time ("Whoa....Whoa...Whoa...").
Not to get all New-Agey on you, but it was a very humbling and spiritual place. On top of being blown away, I kept my mind busy on the many hours of walking by naming the formations. Of course, they have their own oddly specific names given to them by generations of Bohemian tourists. For example, this rock they call "Mayor and the Mayor's Wife":
I dunno, all of the big rocks just look vaguely like oven mitts. All of the minor rocks which didn't have names I christened. Here is newly appellated "E.T.'s Face on a Cobra":
It's E.T.'s face on a cobra, right?!?!?
Anyway, the day was a rousing success. It was also my last for at least a month outside of Poland. I was nervous about crossing the border since I didn't know anything about shops, ATMs, the language etc. The whole endeavor was a big unknown. The giant rocks helped ground me and keep me from over-thinking things. It was time to simply Cork It and Do It.
WOW ... That place looks amazing.
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